Welcome to my world. Its true when people say that a pictures says a thousand words. I cant say how I feel but my pictures can. Please read my story. Lots of love. -leah
| DEMI LOVATO IS THE BEST PERSON EVER AND I LOVE HER MORE THAN ANYTHING. just had to let that out. k. | ||
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Anonymous |
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Hey guys. My name is Leah Goldenberg. I am 14 years old and I live in Massachusetts. I have a crazy ass family. My mom, my dad, my sister, and my 3 dogs. We are all really close and I love my family more then anything. We are Jewish and go to temple regularly. I guess I am the defintition of two faced. On the outside I am this crazy, loud, funny, bubbly girl. I got voted loudest at school in a poll I wasn’t in the running for. On the inside that isnt exactly who I am. I have been bullied since about, well, forever. I am not afraid to say that I am overweight and I live in a town where everyone judges each other in every possible thing. I am one of the only overweight girls in my whole high school. I am not popular but I do have a good group of friends and people do know of me and are not afraid to say hello to me. Of course in every school there is a group of bullies. The bullies in my school were meaner that anything I could have even dreamt up. They called me fat ass, lard face, and a beached whale. I got the meanest glares and I was afraid to go in the lunch line. They would run ahead of me and laugh with their group of friends shouting back at me that I couldnt catch them because I cant run because of all the extra weight I carry. I have pre-diabetes. One girl said the worst thing I had ever heard to me. She said that shoving the needle in me to take my blood sugar wont hurt because supposedly it hurts less if you have extra weight on you. She said that in a way worse way. All of my friends are really skinny and they don’t get it as many times as I would try to tell them. It used to kill me when they would say that they are fat, need to go to the gym, or go on a diet. If they thought that they were fat then what was I? I started to eat. and eat some more. and then I ate some more. Instead of cutting or self harming, I would eat. And to be honest I still do. It was a different way to deal with the pain. At first I didnt consider it self harm but now I know that it is. And surprisingly it is handled in some of the same ways that anorexia and bulimia are dealt with. Instead of cutting to make myself feel better, I ate. I was bulimic for a couple of months but my parents would hear me so that didnt work. Plus I am awful with throw up. It doesn’t work well with me. Its upsetting but I did have suicidal thoughts and kept a bottle of pills under my pillow in case I needed it. I went into a depression and just stayed in the house and cried. All the time. Going to school took so much out of me that all I could do at home was sleep to prepare for the shit I would get the next day. The person that kept me going was my little sister. She was adopted so I am especially lucky to have her. I didnt want her to have me to look up to. I didn’t want her to look up to this sad, crazy person. Kids follow by example right? I didnt want her to harm herself. I didn’t want her to go through the same shit I went through because she thought it was normal. When my parents pass, I dont want her to be all alone. My little sister saved me. I hope I will be here to save you.
Lots of Love,
Leah xx
last updated 2/14/13
Hey guys. My name is Leah Goldenberg. I am 14 years old and I live in Massachusetts. I have a crazy family. My mom, my dad, and my sister. We are all really close and I love my family more then anything. We are Jewish. I guess I am the defintition of two faced. On the outside I am this crazy, loud, funny girl. I got voted loudest at school in a poll I wasnt even in. On the inside that isnt exactly who I am. I have been bullied since about well forever. I am overweight and I live in a town where everyone judges each other in everything. I am one of the only overweight girls in my grade. I am not popular but I do have a good group of friends. People called me fat ass, lard face, and a beached whale. They would run ahead of me and laugh with their friends saying that I couldnt catch them because I cant run. All of my friends are really skinny and it used to kill me when they would say that they are fat. If they thought that they were fat then what was I? I started to eat. and eat some more. and then I ate some more. Instead of cutting or self harming, I would eat. It was a different way to deal with the pain. I was bulimic for a couple of months but my parents would hear me so that didnt work. I did cut for a little bit but it didnt seem to do much. The reason that I stopped is because of my little sister. I didnt want her to have me to look up to. Kids follow my example right? I didnt want her to harm herself. When my parents pass, I dont want her to be all alone. My little sister saved me. I hope I will be here to save you.
Lots of Love,
Leah xx
